sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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