Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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