What did we do last night that was yellow?
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
