It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
