fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
