I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize