I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
