If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
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