do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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