How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
