He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
