i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Randomize
