i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
