Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Randomize
