He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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