Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize