Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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