I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
