I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
