I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
It all started with a game of naked twister.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
