Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
