what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize