if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize