butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
