So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
