EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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