Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize
