That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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