just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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