so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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