life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
We had to coat check the pizza.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
