he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
