only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize