I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
