What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
We got so high we made milksteak
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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