What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize