Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
