ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Randomize