She's JV to your varsity
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
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