did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
You smell like stripper and shame
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Randomize
