i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize