did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
