yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Holy sore nipples Batman
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
