it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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