Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
did you just send me my own nude
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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