Don't you send me to vm
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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