He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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