love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize