3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
