I must be too annoying 4 u.
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
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