when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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