Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
