We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
